Harlot-ween

Halloween-- a time for scary pumpkins, candy, and fun costumes...well, not in college.  The collegiate definition of Halloween is a week long celebration of pumpkin flavor vodka drinks and slutty outfits.  The only thing that's the same is the candy, but I'm sure someone will ruin that too.  Halloween actually starts the Wednesday before the 31st.  Remember the good ol' days of creative costumes?  You could be a monster, superhero, anything really! Nowadays you just get SLUT!  Slut is like an umbrella category, because within Slut you can be a slutty animal, or your favorite non-slutty profession as long as you make it slutty.  You could even be a Slutty Couch! How?? One cushion for the front, POSSIBLY one for the back and leg warmers as arm rests. I'm sure you'll find some dollar bills between those cushions (wink)  Now isn't that creativity!  Have I just ruined your childhood? Clearly you're not in college, but trust me this description does it justice.  At the moment, my hallway reeks of alcohol and hedonism.  And for this I dub this previous week Harlot-ween.  Miss all the Harlot-ween fun? Don't worry you have 358 days to choose an innocent non-sexual item and HOE IT UP!  Good luck and be creative! :]

Ian J.

Plain Ol' Ignorance

I am sick and tired of ignorance on Facebook.  I am so sick of it that I am ready to "unfriend" people because of it.  I know it's the Internet and proper English is not required, but to show that you have some type of education would be nice.  I woke up this morning to see a News Feed full of... I don't know what.  I literally had to sit there and decipher a Facebook status.  I should just quote it right here, but I don't want to hurt anyone.  BUT JUST SO YOU KNOW, a lower case "g" and a lower case "q" are not the same letter. While they may look somewhat similar, they are not the same.  Are you trying to help people who are visually impaired?  I can't think of another reason why so let's just go with that one!  The other type of ignorance that annoys me to no end is spelling words phonetically.  Unless you are being paid by Dictionary.com, Wikipedia, Webster's Dictionary, or you are a teacher, there is no reason you should be writing phonetically.  If there is another reason why please inform me.  Here is an example of both, "qoinq tew dha store." This is not a real sentence.  That is a bunch of letters thrown together.  And if it pained you to read this, then you feel my struggle! Please spread the word with this one because it is an epidemic that needs to be taken out.

Ian J.

Puff Puff "No thank you, I'll pass."

So yesterday was the infamous 420.  To anyone out of college it was April 20, 2011 a.k.a. just another day.  To everyone else, it was "National Marijuana Day."  What this means is I've sat through millions of statuses on facebook about smoking weed and another million about how stupid 420 is.  I've also endured people who smell like skunks walking past my door all night.  Me personally, I could care less (hence why I'm writing about it.) Many people ask me why I don't smoke.  Here is my reasoning:  I'm asthmatic!  God has cursed me with bad enough lungs.  I don't need to make my weak lungs any more pathetic!  Secondly, I just don't want to smoke.  People say it's euphoric.  I think drinking Pepsi is euphoric, and this is good enough for me.  Unfortunately, I gave up soda for Lent, so no euphoria until Sunday.  Either way, if you want to smoke congrats, just don't do it by me.  If you don't want to smoke come join the party!  I'll even buy you a Pepsi! :]

Ian J.

My School Does NOT Have An Art Major

So for the second time this week, the third time since the beginning of the school year, I've seen spray paint and graffiti all over my beautiful school.  REALLY!?!?! What the heck! This weekend someone decided, probably in a drunken stupor, that it would be a good idea to spray paint along the windows on the outside of my building's common room.  They also thought it would be nice to spray the lamp posts leading to the next building.  I saw it and I was dumb founded.  I found out today, they also wrote "GAY" on the back of another building.  Today, I saw someone had drawn a smiley face on the back wall of the elevator with what looked like pen ink.  I rolled my eyes and turned around only to find graffiti on the elevator door.  CUTE, REAL FREAKING CUTE!  It angers me to see this type of stupidity, so much so that this would have curses in this but my mother reads it.  (Thank you mother for my sense of censorship) I don't pay $48,000 a year to live in the projects! Someone needs to get their stuff together!
Ian J.

Cold and Wet

I love when I go in the shower and its nice and warm.  I HATE when I go in the shower and right as I go in 30 other people (exaggeration) come in and shower also!  EXCUSE ME!! This is my time to enjoy a nice hot shower not a communal cold downpour.  Who decided it was okay to have all the showers hooked up to the same water system a.k.a. who decided that more than one person couldn't take a hot shower at the same time?  When you find out tell me and I'll grab my pitchfork and gather the mob.  To have a undisturbed hot shower you need to schedule that accordingly.  You either have to wake up at 6 am (and who's doing that?) or take it in the middle of the day while everyone is in class.  I have class in the morning and I refuse to be funky. So as I sit here in my towel, I declare cold night showers it is.

Ian J.

Heart Broken

Tonight I come to you just a little discouraged.  Have you ever loved doing something so much, just to find out you're not good at it?  If so, I know your pain.  I LOVE LOVE LOVE my English class so much! It's an English theater class (right up my alley.) Everyday I go in with a smile, talk in class, leave with a smile, and I'm just happy when thinking about it. But every time my teacher gives me a paper back there are just so many comments and I get discouraged.  How can I love something so much yet suck at it?  She tells me I have a narrative style of writing when I should have a more analytical style.  I've known this for some time and I just can't seem to break the cycle (yet)  I want to get the best grade in the class but I can't seem to dig deep enough.  So maybe I'll go to Home Depot tomorrow and buy a shovel.  So tonight raise a glass to all the broken hearts and here's to digging deep and hopefully finding gold!

Ian J.

Oh Midterms...

There's nothing worse than having a test.  Correction. There's nothing worse than having multiple tests in the same week!  We've all had them.  The dreaded midterms. [Insert scream/ shriek here.]  Who decided to stress students out and test them all in the course of one week?  Thankfully I only have two this week and that's it.  Unfortunately they are both on EVERYTHING we've learned so far in the semester.  I had my first one today.  I hate saying how I think I did because if I say good it ends up being bad.  And If I say bad it ends up being okay.  If i say I don't know I leave my options open!  By the way, the way I see it is once you've handed it in there's no reason to stress because it's no longer in your hands. OH! And since when is 'All of the above' not the right answer.  I feel like it was created by teachers to say "HEY! Pick this one and you'll be right!"  Well on my test today every other question had 'All of the above'.  I was shocked, dumbfounded and quite upset!  That is not how it works buddy!  Unless all of the answers were 'E', which I highly doubt!  Did you know it's been proven that scan trons automatically lower a student's confidence.  So here is my message to all the students out there:  Good luck! Study hard! And don't let stress get the best of you. :]

Ian J.

Idolization

Today my horoscope said, "Find someone who represents everything that you want to be; then emulate your idol."  It took me less than 5 seconds to realize it was my father. Sorry mama :] My dad is the greatest, sorry if you believe yours is.  He always goes way beyond the call of duty.  He always gives and gives and never asks for anything.  He is selfless and puts everyone else before himself.  His heart contains 110% of love; yes, he is over flowing with love!  He's the smartest person I know but won't go on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire.(College could be paid off!!)  What I love most about him is that he is just as young as me at heart.  We have these sing off competitions and try to out sing each other.  He has the better voice but I like to think I'm always the winner.  We sing and dance together in the car to Lady Gaga, Dev, and Ke$ha!  He's just amazing.  While I know he might not even see this, I'm still going to post it because I love him. :]

Ian J.

Inspiration

I'm writing this in the midst of doing a essay (really the beginning) but it's because I was inspired to write this.  What am I going to write about?  My inspiration!  And I don't have just one.  They come and go at any given time.  My latest inspiration came in the form of Adele's song 'One and Only'.  About 3 or 4 years ago I imagined this whole show.  The story would come along as I was inspired by new songs.  Each song would add to the story line. Just in case you were wondering, it wouldn't be a musical like Glee but, the music is very powerful and important part of the show.  I hadn't even thought about this idea of a show in years then BAM! I was inspired again.  So inspired I want to write a letter to one of my favorite producers and see if he needs a summer intern.  Crazy? Yes! Possible? Maybe... Will I still do it though? DUH!  I am just so passionate about my ideas (I have MILLIONS!) I don't want to let them just fizzle inside my head and die.  I want them to be a reality. I would say wish me luck, but I rather say wish me success!

Ian J.

Happiness Is Key

Someone once told me the grass was much greener, on the other side.  Be an optimist.  It's simple and it's easy.  Always look to the brighter side of life.  A smile can change your day as well as others.  Negativity never go anyone far in life.  Love life and be happy.  Don't let the little things get you down or angry, especially the things you can't control.  Learn to appreciate what you have and don't worry about what you don't have.  Tell yourself how lucky you are.  So, just be happy :]

Ian J.

Post Valentine's Day Realization

I feel like having a small crush on someone is amazing, because when you see this person you get really excited!  But when you see this person too often, it takes away from the magic of seeing them.  I think of it like supply and demand.  The less you have of something the more you want it, and the more there is the less you want.  Now while this has nothing to do with Valentine's day it was just something that I thought about today.  So, what comes next?  Do I continue to lose this MAGIC or do I just think of it as a gift from God.  Shouldn't I be happy with seeing this person more?  Guess I'm just a silly mess.  Maybe it's just because I'm an Aquarius.  I don't really think that has anything to do with it...  Oh well :]

Ian J.

Are College Students The New Nomadic Hunter Gatherers?

They move in packs. They go from dorm to dorm.  They hunt for alcohol, sex, and anything else they can find.  Who am I talking about?  College students, the 21st century hunter gatherers.  And I don't mean to generalize, because some students aren't like this, myself included.  The hunt for college students starts on Thirsty Thursday and doesn't end until Sunday. It's a spectacle only comparable to an African safari.  You can see anything from girls wearing 2 feet of fabric in 12 degree weather to people wondering around the halls at 3 am.  If you wake up early enough, which most won't, you can see the destruction left behind by the wild in their natural habitat.  Seeing food, empty cans, trash, and vomit have all become normal things to me in the morning.  Even while sitting in the hall typing this I have seen two people go to throw up, one person spit in the hall, two girls looking for "the party", and countless amounts of people stumbling around.

Welcome to college,
Ian J.

Conformity Vs. Liking

In the past day, have seen more North Faces than they have at the North Face factory, and its a tad disturbing.  I understand if you like something because it does it's job but to see the majority of my class have the SAME exactly black North Face book bag was a little ridiculous.  Is there a memo that I missed about everyone needing to have this required bag??? 

Shopping list to help me conform:
-North Face Bag
-North Face Fleece
-Mac
-Blackberry
(Please add to the list :])

This isn't meant to offend anyone, it's just and observation with my opinion attached.

Ian J.

What's so Private about private parts?

So at the moment I'm watching Skins.  More specifically I'm watching the most controversial episode yet, Chris.  What makes this episode so risque? Chris walks down the street butt naked and they show his butt.  The show is rated TV-MA yet the actor playing Chris is only 17.  Apparently this MIGHT violate child pornography laws.  And the big question of the last few weeks was is MTV going to show the episode, and if so are they going to show his butt?!?!? We'll America, they did!  While I must say I was shocked, I wasn't surprised.  If you are a fan of Skins (like I am) then you know they are not known for censoring anything.  They put it all out on the table.  Now here's my opinion, if someone is consenting to have they "private" parts shown on television, then they should let them.  Maybe this should be more around the age of 16.  I feel like under that age we are just all kind of stupid/ naive.  No offense to anyone under 16, but you'll understand later.  You can show a baby's bum on tv but not a paid actor???  Opinion #2:  America needs to stop telling people genitals are private, especially because we all have them.  For the most part, all boys have penises and all girls have breasts and a vagina!  Your mother has a vagina and you grandmother has a vagina too! Your father has a penis and so does your grandfather! (GASP!)  And unless your name is Hedwig you have one of the two!  America, the human body is beautiful!  We should love and be proud of our body, not fear it and act like it's not there!

Ian J.

Are commercials made to make us feel like poop?

While sitting at home watching television one of those sex "live chat" hot line commercials came on and everyone was half naked!  If I wasn't eating stuffing Cheez-its in my mouth maybe it wouldn't have phased me, but I was and it did!  I'm a communications major and I learned about the process of making commercials and different techniques they use to get there audience to buy they product/ service.  Problem is, that wasn't one of the commercials made to make you feel bad UGGHHHHHH!!!! So as I continue doing P90X this week I'll remember these half naked people on my tv screen and think to myself I'm better than all of them anyway and I'm perfect the way I am! (eats Cheez-it and smiles) :D

Ian J.

I broke down and made one!

So i told myself time and time again that I wouldn't make a blog...HERE IT IS!!! More specifically I didn't want to make a tumblr.  I don't know why, i just didn't want to jump on that band wagon, so Blogger it is :]  it was something I wanted to do but I didn't want to be another one of my friends reblogging over and over again.  Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with that, and if you can I'll probably end up doing that on here.  But I want this to be original.  I want this to be me.  And now I shall let you inside the mind of Ian J.